"I do", sorta...

The following is a direct response to what was written here...

http://www.nicolavincent-abnett.com/2015/12/here-comes-groom.html

Weddings and marriages where I'm from are complete jokes, not meant to be taken "seriously".
They are more like a dinner theater comedy performance, usually spiced up with some level of drama.
If there is anyone honestly out there, that still believes in any "sanctity" in a wedding or a marriage, you should know that you're the special one, you're the one who's holding on to the past like an eight track player and letter stamps in phone booths made for dinosaurs.
I was with my wife for about ten years before we got married and I was (and still am) so against the definition of marriage, that I refused to sign any papers because to me, that was throwing my dedication, my love and the value of our relationship, into that messy cauldron of idiocy that is everyone else's marriages.

So if you know me or are familiar with my writings, you know that I'm all about progress, especially of the vocabulary kind.
As in, I believe it is time we renounce the words "marriage" and "weddings" as only something we watch the Kardashians do on our teles (that's the new way I'm spelling televisions, Tel-ees and see how into progress I am..?)
From now on, if you want to use the old form of the word marriage, the new word is "commitment".  That should please the gay and lesbian communities as over here, we are still forbidden in like thirteen states from gay marriage.
As in, you can Commit to another person, your pet, your kids, your cars, your "whatevers", and really dedicate your whole life to them, be there for them and try to share some things exclusively with them.
You could even change the name from "spouse" to "commitment partner" huh.
And from now on, the term "wedding" will be known as a "dedication ceremony" so we don't get confused on the purpose.
To me, a wedding is a party that you get free alcohol from, usually there's some dancing, some single chics feeling all needy, you know, some form of puking, crying and hilarity usually ensues.
They're great fun unless you're the one paying the bill and at no time, should you take this event seriously.
A "ceremony" however, is a serious event and you can tell because no one is wearing any clothing that "matches" because all participants know, that the specialness is not something they can see on the outside, it is not something they can measure.
A ceremony commits one partner to the other for life, there are no escapes from your promises, no divorces, no legal battles.

The ceremony with my wife was a small affair, I think we spent less than three hundred because we didn't have any more (oh sorry, dollars, not pounds, the conversion would be, about two hundred British pounds.)
We invited the family and friends that could make it but didn't get upset if someone couldn't attend.  We chose a day that was special to us and it happened to fall on a Monday meaning some people could not get time off, from their employers.
We chose a park down the street from our house, a rock garden complete with rare flowers and a waterfall (and prayed that it wouldn't rain).  We purchased cheap rings that only had special meaning to us, we burnt a disc with our songs on it and pushed play on the boombox.  We had a photographer friend shoot some pictures for a minimal cost.
And in the end, the one thing I remember most was that we took our footwear off and dipped our feet into a tray of water with floating petals before standing, barefoot, on a rock to read our self written vows (okay, the wife "mostly" composed her vows, I had to rearrange some words so it flowed better but that's just because that's how I roll.)
If I need a reminder, we did video tape the whole event and I made a video disc for people that didn't make it.
We've been committed for about five years now and I still love my wife the same if not more.  I wouldn't trade her for any milk bath babe (see previous post) and I cherish her every day, in every way possible.

If you're frustrated with the way the rest of the world works, all it takes is different vocabulary and now you can stop comparing theirs, to yours, because the two are different and you and I, and everyone else, knows it.

Hey special thanks to Nik once again, I had to look up the word "tartan" because I'd never seen that one before.  Never knew and to me, well big fat thanks are well deserved.
The last message from me of the year is:  You have no idea how much some people really appreciate you.